Such a lot for me to think about here, and I appreciate every bit of your frankness and advice. I would love time next week. Perhaps something quiet and fairly private? It would be easier for me to talk more freely that way.
And I’ll be equally honest that there are aspects of the luxuries that Raz and you, and the Council members in general enjoy that can make it hard for me to truly relax. My family does well enough for themselves, but this is an entirely different scale. I’d be much more comfortable talking over a meal, or in a garden, or a museum, than a spa (as enjoyable as the last is.)
You are quite right on the challenges of placing trust (though, honestly, I’ve long had far more difficulty with Ravenclaw witches than Slytherin: I’d far rather deal with subtlety than outright sniping.)
One of the things I’ve spent a great deal of time thinking about, this past month, is that question of who to talk to. The Games, well. Quite a shock, and it’s taken me the time since to even begin to be able to talk to Raz about some of it. And others I’d normally turn to are clearly out of the question or just don't understand the complexities. (And with all the added pain that two of those wreaths were for students I’d taught.)
And yet, clearly, talking is helpful. Necessary. If I'm to move forward.
One thing that’s frustrated Raz this week, talking through some of this, is how sheltered I was in the 80s. I left school in 82, just after Our Lord took the Ministry, but I went straight from there to a very isolated research position. Aldebarana was lovely in many ways, and I look back very fondly on that time. But she didn’t want us distracted or hurt, so I barely left her property for, well, years, other than a few family visits. I heard the news, of course, but it was very different than Raz’s experience, or yours, or most people’s.
And so, finding myself where I am now is, yes, unsettling. I feel entirely like I’ve been transported to Australia, and that none of the stars are as they should be, and yet knowing that they make sense, too, in their own way, once I can learn their patterns.
I am so very glad you’re willing to help. (And I admit, delighted to learn that it’s not solely on Raz’s account. That too, makes it easier to feel more open with you.) I hope this is something of a better beginning for that, and I am looking forward to where we might go together from here.
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Date: 2012-04-06 01:57 pm (UTC)Such a lot for me to think about here, and I appreciate every bit of your frankness and advice. I would love time next week. Perhaps something quiet and fairly private? It would be easier for me to talk more freely that way.
And I’ll be equally honest that there are aspects of the luxuries that Raz and you, and the Council members in general enjoy that can make it hard for me to truly relax. My family does well enough for themselves, but this is an entirely different scale. I’d be much more comfortable talking over a meal, or in a garden, or a museum, than a spa (as enjoyable as the last is.)
You are quite right on the challenges of placing trust (though, honestly, I’ve long had far more difficulty with Ravenclaw witches than Slytherin: I’d far rather deal with subtlety than outright sniping.)
One of the things I’ve spent a great deal of time thinking about, this past month, is that question of who to talk to. The Games, well. Quite a shock, and it’s taken me the time since to even begin to be able to talk to Raz about some of it. And others I’d normally turn to are clearly out of the question or just don't understand the complexities. (And with all the added pain that two of those wreaths were for students I’d taught.)
And yet, clearly, talking is helpful. Necessary. If I'm to move forward.
One thing that’s frustrated Raz this week, talking through some of this, is how sheltered I was in the 80s. I left school in 82, just after Our Lord took the Ministry, but I went straight from there to a very isolated research position. Aldebarana was lovely in many ways, and I look back very fondly on that time. But she didn’t want us distracted or hurt, so I barely left her property for, well, years, other than a few family visits. I heard the news, of course, but it was very different than Raz’s experience, or yours, or most people’s.
And so, finding myself where I am now is, yes, unsettling. I feel entirely like I’ve been transported to Australia, and that none of the stars are as they should be, and yet knowing that they make sense, too, in their own way, once I can learn their patterns.
I am so very glad you’re willing to help. (And I admit, delighted to learn that it’s not solely on Raz’s account. That too, makes it easier to feel more open with you.) I hope this is something of a better beginning for that, and I am looking forward to where we might go together from here.
Aurora