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I've just come back from the funerals for my brother and Andie.

We have a tradition, our family. Every year, someone - Mum, usually - makes a special mead. If there's deaths during the year, we share a bottle. Tell stories about them. Pour out what wasn't drunk in the new year, as a thank you we didn't need it.

And we did for Orion, and for Andie. And then Mum insisted we do it for Harry.

Someone writes down all the things people say. (A complete version, and a - well, people often say stupid things, and so there's a version with those taken out that's easier to reread later.) I have copies, if anyone wants to see what it's like. It's not supposed to be the big stories, the things everyone knows, but smaller things, the things that person just enjoyed a lot.

It doesn't help enough, but it's better than a lot of other things people do for funerals. And having a thing to read privately later, that helps some too.

It doesn't need to be a big thing, or everyone there. Just - I thought I'd pass it on, for anyone it might help.